Baptism and sacrifice

So yesterday I took my son camping and fishing…and attempted to take him canoeing. We went with his Grandfather who owned the canoe but had only used it twice on a calm reservoir. We ended up camping next to a sizable creek…more on the size of a river by not deeper than my waist in most parts but moving full and steady due to snow melt and plentiful rain fall.

Perhaps against better judgment both my son’s grandfather and I were eager to set the canoe in near the camp sit and ride the creek down all the way down to the reservoir. We could see it well enough from the road and all seemed easy enough to access. I may be fairly skilled in a rubber raft but in a canoe, well, no one was. We ended up not being able to paddle correctly, sticking the nose into the reeds, and spilling over the side into the freezing water…..It had been a while feeling that sort of cold and my son was not happy at all. Everyone had life jackets on and I was able to hold on to my son but several things ended up getting washed down the river and it took a an hour or so to get the canoe back to land…A fun little adventure and “waker up” but all in all nothing too dangerous or that caused anyone any real harm. My son was back to sitting near the river as soon as he got on dry clothes but uhh…didn’t want “to go fishing in the boat anymore”

imagesThe more interesting part was talking to my house spirit a day later. He went from commenting on my weekend to going into a lecture about baptism.
-According to my spirit, baptism wasn’t undergone quite the way its done or perceived now a days. He said that during its rise in popularity in the middle east, people and holy men (I assumed he met people like John the Baptist and Jesus himself) didn’t congregate around still pools and eddies along the river but considerable strong current areas. The areas themselves sparked a healthy level of fear in people who did not grow up in a culture where swimming and water sports was a recreational norm…at all. He said that most people then had a general fear of water then in that area and few even knew how to swim let alone cross swift rivers safely. Also becoming “submerged” was more synonymous with drowning and death than it was a test on how long one could hold their breath.
The combination of nearing death and entering into an immediate temperature change as well as sensory surroundings can and does have a particular effect on the human psyche. In the absence of sincere spirituality and devotion it can turn such activities into events for thrill junkies who keep going after a “high”. However under the correct circumstances, such an experience can have a profound affect on the persons will, psyche and life path. Thus baptism back in the day really was an experience of life (death) and rebirth for those daring and faithful enough to brave the “waters of death and rebirth”. The look on some of the faces my spirit showed to me in vision reminded me of my own emotions while going on the “Wild Hunt” and HGA spirit journey I describe in the HGA anthology published by NephilimPress.

I never really focused on “fear” being an element in baptism and a sacrifice of self in order to be reborn in faith. Certainly it would have required great faith to begin with as one by one, you saw people willingly submit themselves to the water and reemerged unscathed. A vision which quite possibly was novel and radical back in the day. my spirit reminded me that these activities were going on when showers and “bathing” was not a very widely practice custom or norm by any meaning of the…concept. I wish that I could recall every word he said and exactly how he said it (I was too busy taking in the lesson rather than writing it down) but the message was clear:
First of all, taking oneself out of the norm and comfort zone in order to seek out the unknown- abandoning safety and the familiar in favor of spiritual connection or enlightenment, is a prominent way of experiencing the divine. This aspect combine with all of the vital and mystical correspondences of water being of the underworld, the astral, the emotion and depth of our existence only compounds a truly mystical experience. Thirdly, the added element of “washing” of purifying body AND mind with the shock of immersion, when undergone with proper intent would truly be a rebirth in no subtle or purely symbolic form. These three aspects aided by a truly heavenly attention and support would yield a veritable and true baptism in every sense of the world. How many of us have actually been baptized in this way?
Were you afraid? Excited? In Awe? Shocked? Or was it just a smooth pleasant and familiar custom which became ingrained in our cultural norm centuries ago? Those of you who know me might guess that I’m after the raw and authentic experience. I strive to know the revelation behind the mystery which is transcendent of repetitious ceremony. I love any opportunity to behold aspects of a mystery which requires exuberant faith, trust, and courage to even approach.
What value without fear, risk, trust and devotion…..What better way to know the expression of love from your heart authentic and unbidden.

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Necromancer by Mani C. Price

Necromancer by Mani C. Price 

Stepping into spirit with keys in hand

 

When your entire being is dedicated to the work of conversing with beings your conscious mind attempts to convince you do not exist, your impassioned -Will- breaks through the mental murk into silence. Here you will behold divine consciousness brought to form. Here you will entreat yourself with angels seen through Gateways of a clear stone, within a circle of unshakable truth…

I’m quite familiar with Joseph C. Lisiewski’s work having read ‘Ceremonial Magic and the Power of Evocation’ several times through during the course of pursuing traditional methods of evoking the Goetia demons. I also have the sequel ‘Howlings’ along with his books on Kabbalah, etc. he definitely does some ground breaking work and has set the tone for the veritable practice of ceremonial magic. Many of his axioms and findings have rung true in my own work with some exceptions… His strict adherence to pseudo-religious dogma and ideals in some instances have created some of the backlash he speaks about not only after magic ritual but in his professional and personal life as well in my opinion.

The author has a determined albeit narrow acceptance of how “things should (or will) work”. In some ways he is the polar extreme to the fluffy “new angers” who have no real experience or know how in magical matters to begin with. I continue to have “mixed” feelings on his works but appreciate his efforts overall and acknowledge the genuine account of experience which seems to coincide with my own.
It’s difficult to find occult books which relate -actual- successful experience working with the grimoires which is why I decided to begin writing. However, excellent and organized works on grimoires are abundant these days with authors like Stephen Skinner and Dave Rankine, Joseph Petterson, Aaron Leitch’s “Secrets of the Magickal Grimoires” is a great primer for actually working these historic texts. If you want to read about actual accounts of those who have practiced historical ritual magic, I also suggest reading John King’s Imperial Arts for the Lemegeton’s Goetia, works by Frater MC, and Jake Stratton-Kent for intelligent relation through discerning experimentation. Each author had a differing philosophy and take on ceremonial magic as a whole, but each has valuable insight.
There are many novice magicians who are hoping to simply encounter a spirit or experience one genuinely and are drawn to ritual/grimoiric magic to accomplish this for them. (This was my initial motivation) Although possible, I believe one can and rather should experience the spiritual and/or divine prior to attempting conjuration. There are a few ways to achieve this but each is a locked door that can only be opened under specific circumstances suitable to the mind of the magician.
The dynamic interaction with spirits that are ‘physically’ apparent and audible, etc. is a major metal/emotional/spiritual shock to most adults who have continually structured their reality paradigm (most likely to counter these types of experiences). As a Psychology student and Hypnotherapist, the event is simply not supported well by most individuals and the mind will immediately construct an alternative to such a blatant occurrence. Not only that but I am convinced of a spiritual “moderator” who is able to determine just who and to what degree these spiritual events can actually be witnessed.
Many if not most will never experience what Lisiewski describes even if they follow his instructions to a tee because of these factors that he fails to mention or is simply unaware of. You can only “Subjectively Synthesize” yourself so much. Some simply do not have the capacity/aptitude to behold spiritual phenomena to the degree he describes (Their psyche cannot or will not support such an event). I know this due to my own experiences of trying to include others in events that confused and bewildered them and for which they were unable to process mentally/emotionally. It’s simply not time for some minds to be awakened to the worlds behind the veil.
After some of the more intense encounters, my rational, conscious mind tried to debate and conform my memory of the experience into a more acceptable framework of its constructed reality. I had to meditate often to cease the battle for acceptance going on in my own head.
My experience is such that I can state now that what Lisiewski describes and explains many times does in fact exist and occur. Yet, I also know from not only schooling but from conversations with spirits directly that not everyone perceives them (the spirits) the same way. No matter what the ritual, things still filter through the levels of human consciousness, perception, and frameworks of comprehension.

From the altar space is cast the inner reflection of the divine soul in hope, union, communion, and awareness….. This space, for you my lord, my ascendant, my mind, and heart to the heavens. Let Thy light and mind show the wonders upon this place, …and by this grace be with me always.
The secret does truly lie with the K&C with your HGA.

Nephilim Press will also be publishing my personal experience and take on this matter soon. I hope you who decide to purchase this work will enjoy the revelations shared by me as well as several other great magicians. Without going too far into the subject matter that the book contains, I believe true union and conversation may only occur through a very dynamic and precise magico-religious shock which initiates a dissolving of the ego, and mental perception of reality and self, that allows true awareness of that which is not created in/by the restring mind.
Some of these major locked doors I alluded to previously can only be unlocked in this fashion. Many do not come to opening their eyes to the spiritual after a rather traumatic and intense event which shifted their awareness, and dissolved long held patterns of acceptability. There is no smooth road to this for anyone wishing to step into the unknown.

The purely psychological model concerning the ‘reality’ of spirits was popular for quite some time. Although I understand completely their reasoning behind this theory my experience has shown me otherwise even when I began evocation and ritual magic from this standpoint myself.

Spiritual beings are completely distinct from human consciousness although, human consciousness, and compression are the filters used to perceive them. They have their own motivations, machinations and purposes. Many exhibit knowledge and traits that people do not have (even collectively) and are not simply, “psychological” aspects of the deep human unconscious.
Like I mentioned, I tried to adhere to this school of thought when I began in my teens, but one I was forced to abandon after evoking a spirit to complete manifestation……I realized that my personal psychology was desperately trying to accept and comprehend the reality of the situation, rather than formulate it. I was also completely aware that the actual being before me was beyond my comprehension and complete understanding. I find people of the purely psychological side of the fence have never undergone this type of experience before.

I get rather amused at those who associate the Goetia spirits to “personifications of human dark or instinctive psychological, etc. natures”. The demons are aware and well-disposed if not ‘versed’ in these aspects of humanity but they go quite beyond that. Their abilities and knowledge transcends anything that has to do with any of these simple ideals. Such as causing earthquakes, storms, and other such phenomena.
They definitely affect and move within those passionate and exploitative aspects of humanity however. That’s how spirits and such typically work with us…magic and influence works on each subtle level through the astrally dynamic.

Fairly recently I heard ceremonial magic, ritual magic, and evocation/invocation defined as “artistic self-analysis”.
Psychology was my major in college. I’m a certified hypnotherapist and spent a lot of time in the psychotherapy field. I definitely see how psychology relates in trying to decode magical workings but does not determine them by any means, just as they do not determine the machinations of the spirits.
Our interactions with formless-consciousness (entities/spirits) are always colored by our culture, language, mind, concept perception and framework of reality acceptances which we possess in the mind. Spirits tap into this and relate in ways our minds can actually accept and at least semi-comprehend.
No spirit needs to “look” like anything but they are themselves as real as anything else beyond perception……the psychological aspects placed on them aren’t necessarily false imaginings per say but they aren’t complete either. This is the reason magicians utilize ‘road-maps’ in order to work with the relative or apparent “chaos” of the spiritual world since it is so different than what physical humans perceive it as. These “road-maps” of course, are the tried and tested methods and/or ‘traditions’.

Certain spirits, angels, ancestors, guiding spirits etc, can actually…fine tune (attune) our perceptions and abilities to perceive and converse with them better. Thus we are able to integrate their gifts (shared knowledge) so that we can actually see, comprehend, and do things we were unable to previously. Often, I didn’t notice all I was learning or being gifted with till afterward.

Relationship is a key concept here with many magicians having their own beliefs about what is deemed as “appropriate” or most beneficial.
Working with the Almadel angels, seemed to naturally open up my ability to actually call other angels and spirits into crystals, etc better so I could see and hear them better where I couldn’t before, as well as do this for others…I’m pretty sure they (the angels) did this for me even without me consciously realizing it.

After one of our evocations, my scryer who is not a ceremonial magician, reflected on how he perceived the magic within the magical circle and during the operation. He said, “Once you begin the ceremony, you seem to create some sort of a vacuum, where the very atmosphere changes and whatever you invoke rushes to the circle, in an instant. It’s amazing!” He also spoke about how the structure and timing seems to get everything aligned and working toward the intended purpose. This made me smile, as like with many things, when you’ve been doing it for a while, you tend to forget just how incredible ritual magic is and how well it can work under the right circumstances. Once certain actions “click” on the spiritual as well as physical side of things, the incredible phenomena will be obviously apparent.
As I’ve stated several times now, its been quite enjoyable getting feedback and outside perspective from someone who is not integrated into the mechanics of Western Ceremonial Magick. The magic works whether you believe it will or not or even know what it’s about…
Without acquiring this link or some sort of ‘Spiritual ambassador’, it’s practically impossible to truly be let into the “club behind the veil’. It’s the reason why many if not most people can go about oblivious to an sign of the spiritual, intelligence…pattern, and design. If we find the correct way to ‘ask’, certain spirits can help us find the correct way to ‘see’. Its training the eye to see the 3D picture from a mess of dots…only, in reality, the dots are there to assist, if you ask

The work continues with new lessons and completely amazing achievements through the celestial powers… There is an extension of soul through which the angelic powers clear the way for clearer realization of full and destined potentiality.

I’ve been asked the question: “When angels or spirits, speak to you, what does it sound like? Do you hear them in your mind or are they actually speaking aloud?”

My response is that it seems to be all of the above and will sometimes seem to alternate without warning. 
Indeed the most confusing aspect of hearing spirits (when reflecting on it afterward) is the sense of distance/location when they are speaking. More often than not, when the spirit has either appeared or made it’s presences known, I will hear them in a way comparable to wearing high-grade earphones where no other sound, acoustics of the room, or any other factor seem to affect their voice. At times it sounds as if they are speaking directly into my ear. At other times their voices sound faint and removed as if they were a long way off though appearing right in front of me. Angels especially seem to communicate running words, visions, sensations and images together in a seamless and rather perfect way.

After a successful evocation, I am often confronted with the realization that my limited capacity to understand what was communicated to me is hindering me to comprehend the larger picture. Conversing with intelligences that definitely have higher methods of exchange seem to break things down in order for human (conscious) comprehension. Luckily, I believe human beings (at least certain ones) are able to tune into a wide variety of communication methods depending on their capacity and frequency in exposure. As a combined variable, the disembodied intelligences or powers can assist the mage greatly to bridge this chasm of dimensional communication. Exactly how and in which ways, or under what circumstances this is decided, I’m not completely sure of. It is not solely based on “attitude” or extreme piety/humility though I can say that. I have conducted evocations in sour moods where I practically expected to fail, all to have the spirit (usually angel) surprise me with a remarkable visit that seemed rather ..undeserved.

Hand-bound edition!

Nephilim Press has released the fine, vellum bound edition of
Gateways Through Stone and Circle.

This hand bound, fine edition book is bound in full Imperial Vellum by master bookbinder Joel Radcliff at Ars Obscura Bookbinding in Seattle Washington. This edition is limited to only 20 hand numbered copies at a price of $350 per copy. To purchase your copy please send an email to frank@nephilimpress.com and we will confirm availability and send you an invoice.
Vellum is parchment made from calf skin, as opposed to that from other animals. The term is sometimes used with a more general meaning referring to finer-quality parchments made from a variety of animal skins. It is generally smooth and durable, although there are great variations depending on preparation and the quality of the skin (there will be slight imperfections in the skin left over from the scraping of the hide, this is normal). The manufacture involves the cleaning, bleaching, stretching on a frame, and scraping of the skin with a crescent shaped knife. To create tension, scraping is alternated with wetting and drying.

Place Marker Ribbon

There is also a maroon place marker ribbon inserted in the book. Hand Marbled Endpapers

This edition also has hand marbled maroon and gold end papers with gold flake particles that sparkle brilliantly in the light.

Leather Skiver
A blood red leather skiver is affixed to the spine and stamped with gold foil. The spine itself has raised bands with gold foil outlines.

A mage’s musings


A quick skim through Youtube reminds me that video recording a sincere magical ritual and posting it online is a very bad idea. Not so much for fear of encouraging countless idiotic comments and arguments from the people who have nothing better to do but argue online, or having a foolish person attempt a sincerely dangerous ritual, it’s definitely not for worry of appearing foolish to a wide public audience …but more so for the poor judgment it would be to post anything worth of value or sacredness for public amusement. The very thought of events that would befall such an action made me sick to my stomach when I simply entertained the idea. Although arcane knowledge can be apprehended when it is sought with a disciplined and mature mind, the whole of occult working should be strictly kept concealed from public view (Thus keeping it occult).

People want to be entertained and empowered by promising effects without doing any of the work (a Paramount disposition in the West). All wish to be convinced to try something or believe in something which they have no comprehension of. It’s a good thing the vast majority of attempted conjurations fail since we would have a lot more broken minds as a result.

I usually cannot make it through an entire viewing of one of the countless teenage presentations of ill-informed summoning attempts. Ninety percent are made by fools feigning to be authentic or even knowledgeable about what they are attempting. Everything from the classic Goetia spirits, Satan himself, or beings fashioned from urban legend and fantasy are attempted to be manifested by every sort of dabbler out there. My only pleasure in viewing these complete wastes of time is hearing their disappointment and frustration when the area remains just as still and calm as when they began their “magical-documentary”. Worst are the ones using TV “ghost hunting” tactics and equipment that try to make something from an obvious nothing.

Fortunately, those who have no aptitude for perceiving spiritual phenomena in the first place and no developed framework/blue print to draw from will undoubtedly fail in their attempts to interact with such forces.
(No, reading a ritual from a book a few times and trying out what it says is not what I’m referring to)
Further attempts to contact the spiritual realm will most likely prevent them from encountering anything in the future due to frustration, enforced lack of belief, and an increasing lack of conviction. These people are not magicians.

The curious side of me at one time wondered what apparitions, events, or noises would be captured if I ever video record the entirety of some of my summoning rituals. It would be interesting to be able to see myself at work from an outside perspective, and see if the events captured by camera were the same ones I witnessed with my own senses. However, I loathe the idea of those mentioned above witnessing what I consider some of the most intensely personal and powerful events in my life experience (whether spectacular phenomena was captured or not). The sincere part of me is sickened by the very thought of profane, vulgar, and ultimately idiotic naysayers being audience to one of the rarest and most sacred experiences known to humanity. Personally sacred to me as well, which in all honestly holds more weight. Important points for being highly selective of those you allow to share in magical operations.

There is something ridiculous about the notion of filming a spiritual event/experience no matter how much the entertainment, proof, or fame appeal is. There are many of us, myself included, who enjoy the thrill of possibly seeing a paranormal or spiritual event captured on film. It’s enticing to be able to “share” in extraordinary events from an objective standpoint. Upon further contemplation, I wondered what would appear on camera if someone going through true enlightenment were filmed. Would there be any sights, sounds, or feelings that an onlooker could perceive who had no reference for the experience? Would it even matter if there were? What would be the motivation for trying to convince people who did not believe or had no prior experience with such matters?

I entertained such questions as the above during the earlier times in my magical experiences. I was isolated by the events I had witnessed and greatly wanted others to share in what I was going through. My teenage years brought about many lessons where I attempted to introduce others to the world of magical reality…
Some succeeded where others failed.

I am not sure if others have had similar experiences but I introduced the magical and spiritual world to a few who were obviously not ready for such events in their lives. If someone’s paradigm is not suited to existence of a spiritual world which is dissimilar to the physically tangible and controlled world they are used to, they may have difficulty accepting any manifestations which appear before their eyes.
If some of you are looking for veritable “solid” auditory and visual proof that such and such exists and can be witnessed and recorded in indisputable ways, I am sorry to state that you are not only thinking wishfully, but impractically as well. You’re trying to cram one world (or concept of the “world”) into another world, which was designed specifically different from one another.

Let’s consider a few other points: Human beings as a statistical fact, are very poor observers and worse at recalling events exactly as they happened. One of the main reasons Hypnosis regression recall is seldom used in courts is because it is not an objective account of what transpired but a limited perception that is cataloged within the workings of a human brain. Our brains absorb information through a multitude of different filters which places a heavy slant on holistic comprehension. This fact multiplies many fold when nonphysical elements are included.

Even with various instruments, video, and audio recording, the human brain is still the final perceive and interpreter of the data. Certain spiritual elements might even be captured on video tape, but unless the one watching it has the ability to perceive and comprehend what they are looking at, the occurrences may still go unnoticed.

As I’ve previously written about, in order to behold certain occurrences, there has to be a suitable unconscious frame work or blueprint in which to perceive it with any amount of comprehension. If none exists, then the occurrence will go by unnoticed (invisible/unperceived) or else just case a slight disturbance which will be brushed aside by the conscious mind as unremarkable. Other times, these same people are shocked by occurrences that frighten and confuse them but give no other framework for understanding.
It’s really not a difficult a concept. Through simple hypnotic suggestion, I can make myself seem invisible to the subject, where they simply cannot focus or perceive I am there because their mind tells them not too. If there is a deeply ingrained structure or “suggestion” that states certain beings do not and cannot exist, its going to be very difficult for the conscious mind to be able to see “that which does not exist”. Introducing the presence of spirits or nonphysical beings to an adult (early teenage and older) mind, that had no previous framework or reference for is practically useless and sometimes harmful. By that time the mind has already constructed a fairly substantial grid of what occurrences are acceptable and included and which are not.

In normal circumstances, perceptions of reality are a sounding board against fellow observers (other human beings within the same social structure) who share at least similar concepts of acceptable reality. Anything outside this spectrum is either discarded by the rational mind or causes a disturbance in which “fear” is typically the reaction, as the mind searches for ways to interpret the foreign information/stimuli and fit it into a known frame of reference from which to attempt understanding.

(Also, research the hypothesis of the “quantum field” when dealing with human conceivability.)

Interesting side effects can occur when people undergo something their minds are not ready for. The results may actually have more to do with the witness’ psychology than anything external. When people are not able to accept or process the information they are witnessing a few amusing (and at other times disturbing) reactions can occur.

Some instantly divert their attention and eyes away from whatever it was I was trying to have them see, becoming nervous and seriously uncomfortable. The body makes odd sorts of shivers, and nerves twitching motions as if attempting to divert all sensory perceptions toward something physical and familiar. Even people who seem to be quite lucid and aware of being in the midst of something extraordinary may later seem to forget or totally dismiss what they experienced since the mind has no place to put the information in a rational, systematic place of familiarity.
Occult power and knowledge is occult {hidden} for a reason, and not due to the powerful and gifted magicians wishing to keep it that way. Many people are not meant to explore the realms of the unknown for a variety of reasons. Exposure to such events or entities, even accidentally can cause mental and emotional disturbance in ways not immediately apparent.
True Magic gives “power to the participant” were new constructs, concepts, worlds, and beings become perceivable and even acceptable over time. Magical ritual creates a systematic blueprint and/or foundation upon which we can build a framework for encountering and experiencing all sorts of spiritual phenomena. Psychedelic drugs or chemicals can bypass the conscious mind’s insistent control over permissible perceptions of reality but will typically not allow useful information and experience to be comprehended once returning to familiar states of consciousness. This is not Magic.
Magic requires the successful mediation between the seen and unseen worlds to whatever capacity the magician is able to fathom. Ritual and disciplined preparation create a road map for which the adventuring mind can observe foreign archetypes and circumstance without completely losing the construct of acceptable reality. Ritual creates a separate space, if you will, for the seemingly “impossible” to occur. Ceremonial alteration in mind and atmosphere allow the learning of new ideas and concepts to be assimilated without a paradoxical conflict of differing realities. In lingering between the worlds, the mind will either shut out what I cannot process or become dangerously unbalanced resulting in skewed mental/emotional functioning and perceptions of reality not acceptable to their fellow sounding boards.

I’m convinced that this process cannot be forced artificially, even with discipline. It also cannot be attempted just by “reasoning it out” even by the most gifted of minds. The parts of the brain which control the perceptions and interactions with the ‘unseen’ worlds are not the rational consciousness. Likewise, there is definitely an ‘exterior moderator’ which seems to allow certain individuals to experience these events and others not to. I still do not understand exactly what factors decide what allows a person to experience the dynamic magical, and what completely conceals it from another. It seems to ring true however, that “A magician is brought forth from his mother’s womb…. all others who assume the function are unhappy.”
The argument for particular magical experiences being “in the mind” therefor is a misconception. The mind is the medium the magician explores the magical world through his or her frame of reference. The Spirits, ghosts, demons, Fae, and angels are there regardless, but extend past what the imagination can hope to capture them in.

A journey for Water

As many may have heard from watching the news, my home state has been on FIRE. Some of the worst areas where not even ten miles away from where I live. Unfortunately, with the insane amount of other responsibilities, I haven’t had time to climb to the top of a mountain with my “wizard’s staff” in hand, calling in thunderstorms like I use to in previous years. However, last week as the fire worsened past the scope of the previous year’s fire, I felt it would be irresponsible not to do something.

Last Thursday night, my scryer and I (a longtime friend and amazing seer and adept in the Celtic/Druidc path) decided to do another “Astral Elemental Plane Journey” as well as celestial journey to the Jupiter/Tzadkiel realm as well… The appropriate Elemental realm seemed to be the plane of WATER.

(To read about the previous experiment of the FIRE realm)

…I began setting up my ritual room as soon as I got home from work and arranged a water alter in the west, containing all of my corresponding tools, my personal ‘water chalice’ implement and a large poster board size Apas Water Tattwa. I also had an oil diffuser with “water corresponding scents” which seem to help.

I also had a printed map of my city and surrounding areas, a large silver bowl in front filled with water, another sealed container filled with rain water I collected from last year and various sea shells, and other “water corresponding” items. My friend and scryer arrived and we began the ritual in the Hour of the Moon.

-I can hear fellow traditionalists scoffing at my “New Age” approach to using Tattwa cards, parts from Opening by Watchtower, etc. However, the methods have been extremely effective and successful for this particular working, not only for me but for my scryer as well. Thus, I use them (and will continue to use them) without hesitation since I am very much enjoying the experiences. There is no lack of power and result each time I have performed this operation.-

As with the previous fire realm journey, I had my (now designated scryer) relax into a chair in the center of one of my canvas circles designed for these types of experiments. He performed his own breathing and deepening techniques to enter into a trance state while he gazed at a smaller version of the Apas Tattwa card. I performed a version of Opening by Watchtower, with intention of opening the door to the Water Astral Plane only using my consecrated Water chalice while my scryer focused on the card.

After the opening rituals, I circulated the circle clockwise to the west and picked up my consecrated Water Chalice. I then faced the Elemental Tablet of Water and alter and sprinkled droplets of consecrated water from the chalice before it three times. I then raised my chalice above my head, and walked clockwise around the circle saying,”

“So therefore first, the priest who governeth the works of Fire must sprinkle with the lustral water of the loud resounding sea!”

When I return to the west, I again sprinkle the front of the Water alter in front of the

tablet. Then, with the chalice I trace a large, blue Invoking Pentagram of Water,

enunciating,

“MPH ARSEL GAIOL “

The water sigil is then traced in the center. I present my chalice to the center of this pentagram

And say,

“ALEPH LAMED AL”

And finish with,

” In the names and letters of the Great Western Quadrangle, I invoke ye, ye angels of the Watchtower of the West.”
I love this ritual since the atmosphere in the room instantly changes to one harmonious with the element invoked. “New Age” complainers can kiss my robe here since the ritual opens a door to the astral as sure as magic exists.

I used methods of hypnotic induction directly after to help my scryer deepen the trance and then instructed him close his eyes to see the water symbol clearly with the natural phenomena which occurs from staring at the shape and color over time.

(Hypnotic induction to deep Theta level, with “astral projection formula” and direction to begin to move through Apas Tattwa as a doorway to the other side.)

As before I used the method to assist others with astral projection and clearly have them see themselves traveling through the symbol as if it were a door way.

{The wonderful reality behind this type of ritual is that I never suggest anything about what my scryer should see or who they might encounter. I simply chant Levi’s “Prayer of the Undines” from “THE CONJURATION OF THE FOUR ELEMENTS” and allow him to experience everything sincerely}
PRAYER of the UNDINES

“Terrible King of the sea! Thou who holdest the keys of the floodgates of heaven, and who enclosest the subterranean waters in the hollow places of earth! King of the Deluge and the rains of the springtime! Thou who openest the sources of streams and fountains! Thou who commandest the moisture, which is like the blood of earth, to become the sap of plants! We adore and invoke thee! Speak to us, ye moving and changeable creatures! Speak to us in the great commotions of the sea, and we shall tremble before thee. Speak to us also in the murmur of limpid waters, and we shall desire thy love! O immensity in which all the rivers of being lose themselves, which ever spring up anew in us! O Ocean of Infinite perfections! Height which beholdeth thee in the depth! Depth which breathes thee forth in the height! Bring us to the true life through intelligence and love! Lead us to immortality through sacrifice, in order that one day we may be found worthy to offer thee water, blood, tears, for the remission of sins. Amen.”
After I completed the prayer and directions for my scryer to project completely through the Water portal, I followed with other prayers and invocations:

“Elohim Tzabaoth, Gabriel, Taliahad” x3
0 Thou, Who art from everlasting, Thou Who hast created all things, and doth clothe thyself with the Forces of Nature as with a garment, by Thy Holy and Divine Name EL whereby Thou art known in that quarter we name MEARAB, I beseech thee to grant unto me strength and insight for my search after the Hidden Light and Wisdom.
I entreat Thee to cause Thy Wonderful Archangel GABRIEL who governeth the works of Water to guide us in the pathway; and furthermore to direct thine Angel TALIAHAD to watch over our footsteps therein.
….
May the ruler of Water, the powerful Prince THARSIS by the gracious permission of the Infinite Supreme, increase and strengthen the hidden forces and occult virtues of my chalice so that I may be enabled with it to perform aright those magical operations for which it has been fashioned. For which purpose I perform this mystic rite of Consecration in the Divine Presence of EL.
In the Three Great Secret Holy Names of God borne upon the Banners of the West EMPEH ARSEL GAIOL I summon Thee, Thou Great King of the West RA AGIOSEL to attend upon this ceremony and by Thy presence increase its effect, whereby I do now re-consecrate this Magical Cup. Confer upon it the utmost occult might and virtue of which Thou mayest judge it to be capable in all works of the nature of Water, so that in it I may find a strong defense and a powerful implement with which to rule and direct the Spirits of the Elements.
Ye Mighty Princes of the Western Quadrangle, I invoke you who are known to me by the honorable title, and position of rank, of seniors. Hear my petition, and be this day present with me. Bestow upon this Cup the strength and purity whereof ye are Masters in the Elemental Forces which ye control; that its outward and material form may remain a true symbol of the inward and spiritual force.
0 Thou Powerful Angel HNLRX Thou who are Lord and Ruler over the Fiery Waters, I beseech thee to endue this Cup with the Magic Powers of which thou art Lord, that I may with its aid direct the spirits who serve thee in purity and singleness of aim to hasten the arrival of forceful waters to parched land.
0 Thou Powerful Angel HTDIM Thou who are Lord and Ruler over the pure and fluid Element of Water, I beseechthee to endue this Cup with the Magic Powers of which thou art Lord, that I may with its aid direct the spirits who serve thee in purity and singleness of aim to bring copious and continual water to heal this land.
0 Thou Powerful Angel HTAAD, Thou who are Lord and Ruler of the Etheric and Airy qualities of Water, I beseech thee to endue this Cup with the Magic Powers of which thou art Lord, that I may with its aid direct the spirits who serve thee in purity and singleness of aim to move large clouds to deposit healing waters to this land.
0 Thou Powerful Angel HMAGL, Thou who are Lord and Ruler of the more dense and solid qualities of Water, I beseech thee to endue this Cup with the Magic Powers of which thou art Lord, that I may with its aid direct the spirits who serve thee in purity and singleness of aim to bring showers of healing waters to my land and area here presented.

My astral senses opened further and began to experience my own sensations of the water realm in lighter context while keeping an active hold on the flow of the ritual. The area beyond the circle appeared to ebb and flow with a cool sense enveloping the ritual chamber. My consecrated and empowered water chalice glowed and seemed to pulse in my hands. My scryer was moving, his expressions tensing and relaxing, obviously having an intense experience as I conducted the rituals to hopefully bring rains back and quench the fires.
” O Spirits of the watery realms, Thy who brings forth life in abundance, O Undines, O Great Elemental Beings of the oceans, seas, rivers, ponds, lakes, streams, pools, fountains, and all other abysses of water, O Spirits of the blood of life, O unstable ones who constantly move, Whose grace flows upon all things, O Sustainers, O Spirits who speak in movements, flowing within the emotions of life, O Regenerating ones, who washes away all impurities, Who haste brought forth the floods of the Heavens, O Healing Suave, O Giver of the Gift of Life, Thy whose depths reflects thy heights, Thy whose sacrifice brings forth life, O Spirits of water, O Spirits of the west, we call Thee forth, Rain upon us, and come as the four rivers that flow forth from Eden, bringing unto us the seeds from the Tree of Life, come forth, come forth, we invoke Thee, come in Thy Gentle Guise, O come Magnificent ones. Amen.”

” O King of the Divided waters, O Lord of the Four rivers of Eden, O Emperor of the four rivers of the Infernal Realms, O Regenerating King of Life, care holder of the Elixir of Immortality, Bestower of Gifts, Granter of Blessing, Lord of Beauty, O Lord of the Vengeful waters of the flood, O Great King of the Sea, come as the rain, and water our circle with the Heavenly Dew of Wisdom, Grace us with your presence, Bless us with Your Beauty, O Nichsa come forth from Thy depths and grace us with Thy conversation. Amen.”
On my altar was a map of my city which was printed with several angelic sigils associated with the element of water, plus other water corresponding symbols drawn on the reverse side. At the height of the invocations to the angels of water, the king, ruler and associated archangel, I asked that rains come to wash the burning flames and restore the hearts of those involved. I unsealed the rainwater gathered from last year and poured it into my consecrated chalice.

……………………………

After I brought my scryer back from the Water Elemental plane, I had him ascend to a celestial realm of Sachiel/Zadkiel/Jupiter as soon as the Jupiter hour felt to be upon us.
This astral experience began high up into the heavens and darkness of space, surrounded by the stars of haven. I directed him to move toward the spiritual light of Jupiter and eventual envision a royal blue door, with gold trim, having symbols and sigils of Jupiter.

“Oh, salutary and benevolent Zadkiel who are covered with honors and who are pleased to distribute wealth and bounty with a liberal hand, open your abode to us by the prayer I am making to you at this hour through your well-loved and favorite Maaguth, Gutriz, Sachiel, Suth and give my venture a happy outcome so that we may render glory onto you!”

<Secret Invocation learned through the Jovial Angel himself chanted>

When I directed my scryer through this door, he was to meet the embodiment of the Archangel Tzadkiel as expressed through the Archetype of Jupiter/Zeus, etc. I again, let this experience unfold without direction till I felt it was time to end the experiment which just happened to be near the end of the Jupiter hour when all was said and done.

I recited a final prayer and also asked the powers of Tzadkiel to bring rain storms as I poured the rain water over the map and then submerged it in the silver bucket of water.
Rain followed and actually showered the exact spot of the fire the following day……rains of increasing strength have showered each consecutive day after.

……..

The experience was incredible and my scryer talked for over 35 minutes after coming out of his vision trance, accounting everything he and I had experienced. My excitement of his relation was that he described the beings he witnessed with such detail and sincerity which happened to match perfectly to what I myself had witnessed. Also, he is not well versed or knowledgeable about spirits and archetypes in western ceremonial magic, so it was fascinating to hear such correlation to somewhere who did not have built up images or expectations.
Luckily, I recorded the entire account on my iPhone and hopefully will be able to transfer it to the laptop and edit it to one smooth file so others may here. It wouldn’t let me send it to email or any other way as it was. His account was absolutely incredible to say the least and would love for you to hear it if you are at all interested. It will be interesting to see the full outcome for the ritual and petition to encourage rain in the area as well.
I meant to post this a day or so after last Thursday but it has taken me a while to edit the audio file of my scyer’s experience. I plan to put it to music and images so I can display it as a video on the blog…Hopefully I’ll have that up on the post soon!

Gateways Through the Stone and Circle

HERE IT IS!

And this time I really mean:

HERE it IS!

< Finally >

I haven’t bothered to look back through each of my postings to see just how MANY I’ve made concerning the release of my book.
(I don’t want to look) It feels like ….well too many.

I don’t think anyone was more eager than I to actually see it come into physical being. Quite a few of you have eagerly been awaiting its release as well and apologize for the many, MANY delays. Hopefully there are none who have been standing by to begin their experiments into DSIC until its release.

Regardless I am very excited and pleased to present to you the standard edition of Gateways Through Stone and Circle

which can be ordered here:

http://www.nephilimpress.com/store

-Fine leather bound editions to be released sometime next month.-

Besides announcing its long awaited release, I also wish to acknowledge individuals who really brought this work from its early stages to the finalized form seen on Nephilim Press’ website.
Besides the exciting journey to becoming a first time published author, the creation of the book was an experience of connecting and acknowledging other acclaimed and/or published magicians who deeply inspired me in the creation of the book. Most are well known adepts, authors and teachers in the magical community.

Mentioned in the actual texts are members of the Gentlemen for Jupiter which spearheaded my interest to explore this particular text of “DRAWING SPIRITS INTO CRYSTALS”
http://www.gentlemenforjupiter.com/

Frater Rufus Opus http://headforred.blogspot.com/ is to be acknowledged foremost for his inspirational Planetary Gateway series and open sharing of his experiences and workings. He is a well-respected magus and introduced me to the other founders of G4J

Magus Aaron Leitch’s works, personal feedback, and fine example he and his wife demonstrate as ‘Magus-scryer’. http://aaronleitch.wordpress.com/
Many other scholar-magicians assisted with the book’s developments that are not directly named in the text:

Huge thank yous go out to Mr. David Rankine http://occultofpersonality.net/david-rankine/, Stephen Skinner and Mr. StrattonKent for their encouragement over email and feedback to improve and expound on the MS’s early stages.
David especially was very generous with his time and continued advice for getting my work published.

Adept Michael Cecchetelli http://thelionsdens.blogspot.com/ was paramount in Gateway’s publication. His support of my work and communication to Nephilim Press made this book possible. It was an unexpected blessing to receive such brotherly assistance from such a successful author.
To Asterion Mage http://solomonicmagic.blogspot.com/ , an enormous amount of gratitude goes out to him for his phenomenal job as illustrator. I have always admired his inspiring artwork and dedication to exploring Solomonic Magic with scholarly precision, so getting to work with him on this project was a sincere pleasure. I was able to share my visions with him and have him duplicate it with knowing skill which made the work come alive.

I am continually grateful for my longtime friend and talented scryer Mr. “Strider” Willman for his review of my book and obvious contributions to the continuing experiments.

I am proud to recognize my singular student in this art, Mr. H. M. with his masterful feedback, and dedication to conducting the traditional experiments with precision and exquisite detail. He is the exemplary magus and student of the occult. His experiences and development using the content of the book has given me faith in its ability to empower others to experience similar wonders.

Many other friends in the magical community assisted with its review and editing and I am grateful for all of their work and attention!

Finally and most importantly, for the actually publication goes a huge thanks to Frank for not only taking a chance on my first MS but giving overwhelming support and encouragement for it. His treatment, communication and professionalism were second to none. During the tiresome finalization of the book Nephilim Press continued to offer assistance in getting it completed.

I truly hope serious magicians enjoy and benefit from its use. I also look forward to hearing about personal experiences from many of you!

To ban or not to ban?

“Too Much Banishing”


This was interesting topic which was brought up in Aaron Leitche’s Solomonic Group http://aaronleitch.wordpress.com/, and one we hadn’t touched on for a while.

“Banishing” became a staple of western ceremonial magic with the majority of practitioners at the time coming out of one of the main magical lodges associated or branched off from the Golden Dawn. Even witchcraft’s “creating sacred space” is a heavily influenced concept from these same lodges.

Interestingly enough the more you get into historic forms of traditional magic there is very little “banishing” done, especially as a routine -after and before- procedure. A traditionalist mage myself many might find it ironic that I am not altogether against this
theory and practice established and encouraged by the Golden Dawn. Perhaps it’s because I underwent the suggested daily and nightly practices myself and acknowledge that undertaking as a building block of my own ceremonial practices. The ritualized gestures, divine names and concepts still hold enough potent meaning for me to be useful. However, you won’t find me using them before, during, or after a spirit evocation which would seem odd to many CM’s I’m sure. My tolerance for ritual “banishing” may also be influenced by the fact that Western Ritual Magicians were commonly priests and clergymen if not highly religious individuals who worked with spirits on very strict standards and never formed “buddy-buddy relationships or treaties with them. Evocation was a serious experiment and done with caution and the authority of God.


The Solomonic forum mentions various arguments against banishing and some that make excellent points. I agree with the ones I read which stated many magicians prematurely severed developing spirit relations with an over use of “banishing” internalized rituals once the uneasy sense of a spirit was actually recognized. Persons unfamiliar with such phenomena naturally experience the “unnaturalness” or at least unfamiliar sensations that go along with a veritable encounter and may all too swiftly determine them as “bad” or “negative”.
(This magician suspects that a vast majority of aspiring mages expect the sensational safety of a Disney ride when working with spirits)

The truth of the matter is I still practice the LBRP and LBRH fairly frequently but have realized their benefits are for different reasons than what is typically attributed to them. When I conduct these particular rituals, (at least with the Kabalistic Cross) any “banishing” that occurs is more so within my own being than directed toward any “nasty influencing spirits” which may exist outside of myself. Early on, the practice became an energetic centering and reintegration within the sacred sphere of divine action. They are typically coupled with the MP exercise as well as other forms of prayer and meditation congruent to the energies of the aforementioned rituals.

Granted, any spiritual intelligences which would find the gestures, tools, and names of the aforementioned rituals unappealing may very well vacate the area, but it has not disturbed the familiar working presences within my own abode. A mage’s intentions while conducting these rites may have some influence on “external reactions” as well. For myself, a silence and clarity typically expands in my head afterwards which makes communication and interaction with spirits easier. Again, it seems to be a practice centered within my own consciousness and sense of perception rather than forceful clearing of an area. My apprehension of the drawn pentagrams in space are not necessarily for the removal of astral influences from the plane of earth but rather the severing of disjointed mental/astral distractions brought on by my own mind from the physical axis of my foundation.

When I wish to severely banish or rid a spirit of a person, place, or thing which is a very rare case (three times to the degree I am writing about in my magical career) I will use methods of no subtle means. It typically involves the strongest incantations I can muster with additional salt, iron, lead, brass, curses, washes, burning, and censing. Refer to the Greater Curse or spirits chain of the Goetia for extreme case examples. My reasons for these harsh methods are only brought about by circumstances where I feel a real danger or threat. I will only resort to such action when I am unable to nullify substantially harmful spiritual threats by any other means. Let me be clear in stating that I am not of the school of thought which forms buddy-buddy relationships with goetic spirits or beings of questionable influence but am similarly not hostel toward them or assume them to be creatures of inexhaustible ill intention. Indeed the full spectrum of spiritual beings has its rightful place and purpose quite beyond my own comprehension.

In cases where human and spirit simply cannot coexist harmoniously within a certain area, I will usually try to find a suitable destination that the spirit will eventually and hopefully find more agreeable. I have run up against some stubborn cases before but have not resorted to threats or punishments. Perhaps ironically, this was due mostly to the assistance of other spiritual beings who understood the situation far better than my perceptions allowed.
In my ongoing development of networking with spirits and fellow magicians alike, I am continually reminded of how much of a diplomat and ambassador I’m turning out to be. Not necessarily a great one in either respect but how the training and lessons seem to fall along those professional lines. Proper, communication and exchange between foreign parties of dissimilar background is a continual effort of refinement. The perks make the efforts worthwhile and the drawbacks are undeniably frustrating. A magician cannot hope to gain report with any manner of spirit if they are so quick to dismiss and command them at leisure. However they will quickly lose defining meaning of exchange if a spiritual or tradition based “road map” is not integrated within their manner of communication. Cultures, beliefs, and philosophies differ on the methods of spirit diplomacy and interaction. Those who seem the least effective in either are the ones with no sense of structure or connection or try to pick and choose on a whim.
Thoughts arise as to the nature of the transference of energy from place to place as a magician moves his residence to another area to another house, and possibly a vastly differently climate and geography. Since I feel I’m arriving at that point soon myself (although the climate will doubtfully be noticeable), I wonder at the about the subtle and dynamic spiritual encounters which were encouraged by the genius loci of my current residence. What will come with me and what will be left behind? How many spiritual beings were drawn to my workings and have more or less taken up permanent residence there? How much of a clearing I should do if any, as a responsible magician so as not to (possibly) frighten the next set of people who move in after my family and I have moved out?

This will not have been my first move while seriously conducting such practices, but it will be a move after my most recent and intense experiments I’ve ever experienced thus far. Tactically present relationships have been formed and ongoing for some time. Although most are by no means bound to one space or location, I‘m certain a number of them are. It’s the first time I’ve ever had a set chamber for conducting nothing else but magical workings. The room itself has a VERY distinct atmosphere and presence which never seems to lessen. Some very intense experiences, very potent items and books, are all kept there under ward. I’ve often wondered if something will linger (and to what degree) and how long after or quickly it will fade if I don’t personally do anything to remove what was built up in that space?? Despite some issues of abandonment or some sense of dislocation from spirits who may find the change of residence not to their liking, I will most likely assure the space is “deactivated” to the best of my ability despite any linger curiosity. However the very thought stirs something unease within me after the years of discovery.

A smile crossed my face as I recalled how my wife was looking at every single house as needing a magical room space adequate enough for my workings. I was amazed and complimented her thoughtful understanding on this but she considered it as a matter of course, just as important as a house needing a living room for instance. Much of my magical life is still concealed from my visible, public life so it’s easier to reflect on the pleasant humor of such striking differences a magical house hold has.

Magic is everywhere. Some places seem more active than others, and the true sense of power resides within the soul-mind of the magician and his/her connection to divinity. However, any magician of practiced years will acknowledge the presence of potency within objects and places continually used for arcane endeavors.

Ritual magic is a symbiotic weaving of interconnecting energies and intelligent patterns which extend beyond the conscious apprehension of the initiating mage. Any act in magical intention sends information frequencies along countless subtle lines of creation. Fledgling magicians who think their imaginings and actions through rituals began and end inside their own mind, are fooled by their own thoughts.

All relationships, subtle or profound should be acknowledged and given conscious appreciation if not notice when circumstances are altered. Magicians excel with their sensitivity to the subtly of the unseen world, not a distracted indifference to it.

Reserve List

ATTENTION!
-A reserved list has been created for the long awaited-

Gateways Through Stone and Circle
“A Manual of Evocation for the Planetary Intelligences”

-If you would like to reserve a copy which will be available around the first of April, enter your name and email in the
PREFERRED CUSTOMER section on:

http://www.nephilimpress.com/

in order to receive current book releases and news for when the book is available for order. Each person must enter their own info in order to receive their reserved copy.

and specify if you would be interested in a fine leather-bound edition (limited to 12), basic leatherbound or the standard cloth-bound. –

More info on the book bellow or go to

http://www.nephilimpress.com/forthcoming/

“Gateways Through Stone and Circle” is a compendium of personal experiences and research from a traditional ceremonial magician working through a classical book of magic. This volume is a complete and in-depth study in the “Art of Drawing Spirits into Crystals” as found in Francis Barrett’s, The Magus, and accredited to Trithemius of Spanheim. Detailed research, personal experimentation, and evoking each of the seven planetary archangels and intelligences to visible and auditory presence are presented within. You will find descriptions of the seven planetary archangels as witnessed by the author, instructions for building each of the traditional implements and furniture to the specifications of the grimoire, as well as detailed illustrations of the author’s actual equipment. Items such as the infamous Book of Spirits or Liber Spirituum are explained in detail so the reader will know how to make and use one. Chapters also describe methods for improving scrying abilities, working with a partner, and conducting the entire ceremony from beginning to end. Everything to make this art work is explained in incredibly vivid detail.

The purpose for this book is to present a workable manual wherein the aspiring magus can replicate a valuable system of magic to achieve successful and reliable discourse with some of the most powerful beings in the cosmos. “No other book has unveiled how to perform this experiment successfully within the traditional manner.” This work is not a theoretical analysis of a historic manuscript from an academic scholar, nor is it based on presumption and guess work. It is a modern day grimoire from a traditional grimorist. It is drawn from one who has been studying and practicing Western occult magic for nearly two decades and has recreated the procedures that achieve results. The methods contained within are constructed as closely to the original text as possible and filled with suggestions and points to assist the beginning magician as well as the advanced practitioner.

The author decided to add more material to the book after his test audience made some suggestions. The book is scheduled to be released at the end of April of this year.

Book by Frater Ashen F.:N.:F.:

From what I’ve been told by my publisher there will be two or three different editions available:

-A Select number of twelve copies will be made bound in fine calf leather with silver gilt accent leaf and other features which will be the collectors grimoire.These rare tomes will be selling for $350-$500.

-The next will have leather binding and accents that will be around $150.00

– The fine cloth bound, hardcover standard editions will be under or around $60.00.

The prices are based on estimates I was given and of course will ultimately be determined by the final format and materials used, etc. For those who are interested in the fine or any other editions, enter your name and email address in the Preferred Customer section on:

http://www.nephilimpress.com/

Hey wizard, What’s your religion?

A few reflections:
“Philosophy: Comparative Religions” was one of the most interesting college course that I ever had the pleasure of taking. That class along with Cultural Anthropology, my multitude of Psychology courses, Ethics, and a few others. The professor of the aforementioned course was one of those rare individuals whom you will never forget and will forever have the utmost respect and admiration for. She was over seventy years old and mentally sharp as a razor blade. She was able to argue intelligently and convincingly from any religious/philosophical standpoint and pretty much own a debate on all ends. She challenged me at the best points of my discussions, making me reconsider statements I made during class which I had the utmost confidence in. I began growing a profoundly richer and more compressive view on what I truly believed, and more importantly WHY I believed. I was also able to release, change, and discard previous “truths” I held on so tightly too and was able to reexamine assumptions I had about the workings of the world. I have found that as I go on through life, I’ve taken the academic and scholarly skills I learned in school and have applied them to my daily work and experience. My wish for everyone is that they find those rare teachers who truly do make a difference.
One of the largest areas my comprehensive learning has changed would be my views of religion and faith. Before my college courses and further learning, I had already abandoned the position of being in the “Singularly correct and one true Christian faith”. I had been raised Methodist which may possibly be one of the “lightest” forms of the Imperialist Monotheistic religion. I actually enjoyed church growing up and engaged the minister after his sermons on points of the various sermons. Religion, faith, scripture, and ethics were never “boring” to me so I never accepted it as passive integration into my life. I actively embraced, pursued, and questioned it. However, by my early teen years, I was having too many personal experiences with the spiritual and supernatural to accept any religious dogma as being anything near “fact” or “Truth”. Eventually after learning the history of my birth religion’s atrocities towards other human beings and faiths, I abandoned it altogether in search of something more agreeable.

I became quickly drawn to Celtic Druidism, (having skipped over the more popular Wicca and Witchcraft movement as being to erratic and popular-media driven) as it contained almost all the aspects I had been looking for and what I also felt intrinsically to be closer to a living “truth”. I researched and studied all I could on the subject, making some very close friends and contacts on the way. Shortly after, a “grove” was formed and I became an active member and leader within its small numbers. I experienced many rituals, gatherings, and events that shaped my life and to which I still hold a dear measure in my heart. My “break” from this path was brought on more so by the people than the philosophy. I enjoyed the wisdom and abilities from a select few but found that many pagans were undisciplined and rather erratic in their approach to spirituality and religion in general. They were angry or dissatisfied with the mainstream religions or culture they were brought up in and still had trouble securing measures of success and balance in their personal lives. “Organized Pagan Religion” was very much a new concept and many groups disbanded not long after they were formed with the leaders often being people of unhealthy physical, social, and psychological standing. Unfortunately, our own group, like many, began being more focused on mundane, social activities and complaints about “The Christians” rather than doing our parts to make the world and ourselves better.

At one point I realized I did not require any specific social group to be convinced that I belonged or which I needed to feel imbued by others with some sort of esoteric importance. I vied to focus solely on personal development in magical and spiritual arts no matter what tradition or religion they stemmed from. Within the past decade or so I returned largely to the Western Esoteric systems of magic which are largely Catholic in nature. The irony of this decision was not lost on me and I found myself mending many broken ties with my former religion as well as having deeper appreciation for the Catholic Church which I previously held just above a level of contempt.
Few people these days will ask about my religion or what I believe, but when they do I will respond according to how I wish to steer the conversation. I will never lie or mislead intentionally but will typically not answer directly for a multitude of reasons.

-If I were to give a direct answer, I would state that my “religion” is Magic. In saying this, one would have to understand what my personal definition and understanding of what “magic” is. The word itself stirs up a multitude of images and labels in our society, even among practitioners. The essence of the word for me is the embodiment of my personal connection to the divine. It is the conduit through which real “truth” may be seen. When it works and is working well, I experience life, and the spiritual in stark clarity and expression. I integrate information and wisdom from a source beyond human relating and simple written words. I experience beings and energies that are dissimilar to any other involvement in the world. The whole spectrum of experiences and sensations that the practice of magic has given me makes up the closest thing I can have to a solid religion. Just like a reasonable Christian would see Jesus/God as being the focus of their faith and not “Christianity” itself, “magic” for me is not the object worshiped but the method, the practice, I utilize to worship. In my case the worship is geared toward whichever aspect of Spirituality I am focused on at that moment, which I all conceive of as being from a Creator who exists beyond the capacity of religious framework or human comprehension. By magical means I can connect to the current of vibrant and living archetypes, spiritual beings of great power and feel some measure of their influence.

Through my magic I can be okay in realizing that my perception and conception of the spiritual/divine is limited by my own psychological, cultural, social, environmental, and genetic variables. Though academic learning, study, and interaction with fellow magicians and thinkers I can appreciate the diverseness of experience and comprehension of the universe. Because of my magic, I can be okay with experiencing the unknown in a particularly unique and individual way because I am actually experiencing it. Through magic, I can study the techniques of priests, healers, seekers, shaman, and wise-people of various cultures and religions try their methods out for myself and see if I can experience a part of their own conception of truth or spirituality. Through magic, and faith in its origins, the unknown is not something to be feared and avoided, its something to be explored and sought. Through experiences by magic, I’ve learned that not all intelligent beings in the world, think and reason as human beings do which has caused me to be more humble and open toward events I don’t understand.

By magic, I can immerse myself in the ecstasy of divine presence without any need of assistance from other human beings. Magic, is indeed my “religion”: The vehicle I use to experience divinity and understand the divinity within me. Through magic, other faiths are not only appreciated, but experienced. Anytime I am present to experience the divinity of nature, the words of truth from another falling upon my ears, while gazing upon the wonderful workings of art, expression, beauty, life in existence, it is magic. Magic is life, magic is constant and pervasive for those who can feel and sense it moving through them. It is beyond the frequencies of human comprehension and sensation, yet can enhance and strengthen each. Beyond any other sensation or physical experience, involvement in magic has taken me to the deepest levels of passion, and the highest states of spiritual bliss.
My view of the Druid, magician, or wizard still remains the same, even after all these years. Beyond the title, they are the ones who stand apart in their journey when compared with the multitudes of humanity and their pursuits. They are the ones who assist those in their community as best as they are able to with the seen and unseen goings on. They are the moderators between the spiritual and physical worlds; those who attempt to have the widest view from as many sides as they can see so as not to be blinded by limiting “human ideals”. Beyond right or wrong, they experience what they believe instead of accepting it from others. Hopefully they/we are the voice of reason when fundamentalists of any standing threaten to become extremists.
Despite the best of intentions and the highest of learning however, the magus will error in his assessments and judgment. We are human after all and cannot see all beyond the filters of our humanity. Even as we stand apart, we are put back in our place by the same works we seek to understand and often control. That’s why the wisest among us will wrap themselves in the mantle of humility and compassion.